Posted in darkness and light, I AM Presence

Prayer To Call In The Entirety of Oneself

“I’m calling in the energies right now, to own myself, completely and utterly.

To own all that I am.

To call in all the disparate energies that are me that have scattered to the four winds

Hear me! I call you back! I address all those parts of me, all those energies that ever left me or were taken from me.

It is safe. It is safe to return to the source, to be whole, to be healed, to be one. I am ready to love you, I am ready to own you

I own my body

I honour my physicality and the ways my body speaks through sensations and pain

I own my feelings

I embrace my anger, sadness, fear, hurt, and allow them to express and unfold

I own my story

I accept the hand I’ve been dealt, that my soul is choosing, and the learning my wounds have brought

I own my wounds and trauma

I allow the depths, the cracks, the burdens that I bear to give me their gifts and teach me their wisdom

I own my thoughts and beliefs

I observe the meandering narratives and persistent absolutes and thank my ego for standing at the interface between myself and the world every day

I own my heart

I ask my heart to remain open and enable the flow of love, knowing that my soul is ever present at my heart’s centre, knowing that the more open my heart is, the more freely the divine flows through me and from me

I own my voice

I enable my words representing my truth and vision to be expressed with power and conviction. I am ready to be heard and will not shirk from speaking my truth

I own my intuition

I get out of the way of myself and let divine inspiration guide me

I own my authenticity

My authenticity is the truth of my being, it is my acceptance of self, it is the owning of my entire multi-dimensional, multi-faceted and integrated being

I own my power

I recognise my sovereignty and know that I am rooted into my divinity and that my foundation is love. I have been holding closed the floodgates of my power but now I unleash my power upon the universe

I own my darkness

I am ready to see and accept that there are no sins, only choices. Whether foul or fair, it is all me. It is all a part of the canvas upon which the divine plays and explores itself. There is no judgement from now on, no evil exists here, only darkness and light, and I embrace them both as I would my children

I am ready to fully step into myself, to never falter from being true to me

I release all the energy that I’m holding that isn’t mine. Begone, return to your maker, you are not for me.”

[Image: This is my one and only tattoo which I call Kali Na Gig, a version of the Crone Goddess bringing forth the energies of empowerment. Inked by Pixtattoo, Southampton, UK]

Posted in darkness and light, Energy healing

Working With Anger

Recently, I wrote about a situation where my anger was coming out and being expressed, in a post called ‘Fire From Within’. I decided to do some work with my anger and just at that moment, specific guidance appeared to help. Not for the first time, exactly what was needed materialised at the right moment.

So it was, I sat with my anger and, asking for clarification, realised it emanated from injustices perceived as a small child. These were experiences of being bullied and traumatised by others. My little self didn’t know why I was being attacked, but had the sense to realise it wasn’t fair. The initiator of my current anger, held within for many years, was my childhood self who didn’t have a voice and was still feeling neither seen or heard.

Anger, albeit internalised, was my lifeline. Anger carries a lot of power and energy, it became my strength and salvation. It meant I was a fighter and survivor. I didn’t give up, I always believed in myself deep down and held the power to eventually cultivate inner love for myself. As a child, I learnt to hide my power, because if expressed, I was punished, but it was still there, defiantly lying dormant within.

When I recently started exploring my anger, I called in a white healing light and was bathed in unconditional love that allowed me to see my anger differently. I saw how it was only because of experiencing injustices that I experienced anger, and it was due to experiencing anger that I experienced my creative power. And when the illusion of anger subsided, I saw that my power was love, unconditional love.

With this unconditional love, which bathed me completely, I saw myself emanating a great cloud of soft pink love towards all those who I had received injustice from. I perceived that I loved them unconditionally. There was nothing there but love, I was nothing but love.

This power of unconditional love has become my foundation. From this foundation, I create. I feel strongly called to make paintings whilst coming from and holding this powerful pink light of unconditional love, so that the canvases themselves hold and convey this love towards all who gaze upon them. The energy is a softness, a flow, it is union, divine unity expressed creatively. Maybe the paintings can help others dissolve their anger and release the power of their creativity.

Anger is an expression of fear and yet, anger can be very powerful, creative and valuable but we must not let that anger become stuck, it must flow as we allow it to be expressed. Every energy we think of as negative is there for a purpose and that purpose brings more love and light into our hearts, if we let it.

Imagine that your base chakra is a red colour.

When you take your awareness into your base chakra and ask if there’s anger there, what do you learn?

What do you learn when you sit with your anger? Stay with it for a while.

Now call in white healing light and see it turn pink when it merges with the red inside your base chakra. This pink colour is unconditional love, let it bathe your root chakra and transform your anger.

Stay with the energy as the pink light dissolves away the illusions of all your anger and allows you to see, with clear understanding, the original source of your anger.

Notice that your new understanding is transforming into the resolution you need, whether it’s the need to forgive, to embrace peace, to love yourself more, to let go, to open up, whatever it is for you.

Know that the anger has now been released and yet, the creative power and force that underlies it will continue to flow from your base chakra and become your foundation, from which you can create anything and everything you could imagine.

[Image: ‘Phoenix Nest’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in healing, The Truth of our Being, transformation

Being Authentic

Over the years, there have been times when persons have judged me as coming up short in their estimations. It happens, perhaps it’s happened to you. I’ve always had a good radar for reading people but I could read myself too and knew where they were coming from.

I didn’t know what was missing in me that made me express myself in a limited way.

Now I understand, I grew up a traumatised person and consequently, was not able to be authentic. It took me a while to recognise that and longer to change.

Authenticity isn’t something we do, only be.

People can only be where they are on their life journey and that’s okay, but that’s not necessarily the entirety of the ‘who’ of us. Because the truth of our being unfolds.

We are all in a process of movement through fulfilment.

So, let’s give people a chance, let them in a little more. Give others room to grow. Let’s do that for ourselves too.

We are often struggling with each other, with ourselves, learning to love, to trust, to open our hearts.

Being authentic is the easiest thing in the world when you’re ready for it, until then, it can be the hardest thing to find. But it’s there, deep inside, it’s always there. Like a diamond waiting to be revealed.

[Image: ‘Sunset over the estuary from Burry Port’ photograph by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, inner child, Personal Story

Fire From Within

The other day, things got a little fiery. I was in conversation with someone who knows me well and who I love greatly when things started to get out of hand. At first, I was calm and patient but when I felt we were going around in circles and I wasn’t feeling heard, I got fierce.

Two days later, we had a conversation about it when it was said to me; “Because you do so much spiritual work, I was surprised to see all that anger in you!”

You and me both. I had to take a look at it myself.

I remember, a long time ago, someone asked me why I hold myself back and I said, “Because if I were to let go, people will get annihilated.” I really felt the rage that existed inside me but didn’t have the capacity to understand or release it at the time. It was going to have to come out at some point.

It seems I’m learning to let it go.

When we’re on the spiritual journey, there comes a time when we finally learn to embrace our love for ourselves and then we no longer tolerate what we used to accept from others. And that’s when things can get empowering.

I’ve always known that kind of power is inside me.

Like Kali, Cailleach and Ceredwen, I am fierce and capable of delivering a fatal blow to your ego. I can unleash fury like a lioness, strike like a cobra with my cutting words.

I embody the Crone, I am a cracking whip that stings but the sting won’t linger. The more I love you, the more I will honour you with my fire.

Don’t get me wrong, 99.9% of the time, I’m kind, caring, easy going and tolerant. But lately, the deeper I go inside and the more I make space for myself, the less will I tolerate and the fiercer I am.

For some years now, I’ve been healing many traumatised, abandoned, rejected and lonely inner children of mine. I’ve been searching for them, embracing them, acknowledging and loving them, healing and integrating them back into my being, into my heart, into my whole self. Those beautiful children have suffered so much. And some are angry.

Each integrated inner child has my permission to express the entirety of their true selves through me, all the qualities that I once embodied but were knocked out of me. They brought back to life the feisty, sparky firecracker I used to be, now expressed as a grown up who’s ready to claim the full extent of her power.

No filter, no regulating dial, just full-on, absolute brutal honesty. Yes, it’s true, I’m not for everybody. And these days, I come with a warning.

Posted in death, dragons, Inspiration, Personal Story, Soul Mastery

Amenet Drago & Mastery the Black Dragon

I first received my soul name in the summer of 2018. I was waking from sleep and heard “Amenet” spoken, strong and loud. I knew instantly that it was the name of my soul. When I received my sacred soul initiation a few months later, the name came through again. I did some research into Amenet, since I hadn’t come across this name before that I could remember.

The first information I found was about Amunet, the ancient Egyptian Goddess, female counterpart and twin flame of Amun. She is the original primal divine Goddess whose name means ‘she who is hidden’. This title refers to her being hidden in plain sight. She is everywhere, present in everything, and yet, only the initiated can see her presence because she is hidden within.

The ancient Egyptians didn’t use vowels when writing, so her name is spelled in numerous forms; Amunet, Amenet, Amaunet…

In the Akan culture, the same deities are known as Amenet and Amen. Akan is primarily present in Ghana and Ivory Coast, with an ancestry clearly rooted in ancient Egypt. Amenet is the supreme Great Mother and with Amen, they are the embodiment of Divine Union.

I am not suggesting that my soul is that of a goddess, except from the understanding that I believe we are all divine beings, so I do like to think of myself as such, but not exclusively so.

I recall several ancient Egyptian past lives, it feels like ancient Egyptian culture is the time my soul has loved the best and I remember clearly when my Earthly personality was called Meritamen, which means ‘blessed of the hidden one’.

During 2019, I made a vision quest and after that, a black dragon started to make itself known to me. I began to feel his presence during meditations. I felt a kind of awakened memory of extreme affection and deep knowing with this powerful being, so I tuned in and received his name, Mastery. After that, it was as though he was often around in the background.

Fast forward to late 2020 and I was painting my newly acquired shamanic drum. I knew intuitively that my dragon friend, Mastery, was going on the drum’s image and as it turned out, so was my soul, Amenet, in her Egyptian form. As I tuned into the energies, four words came forward to be painted along the rim of the drum; Soul, Dragon, Mastery and Amenet.

I knew these words were intimately bound to my soul calling, and somehow, they arranged themselves into Soul Mastery and Amenet Dragon, but when I painted the last word, I intuitively stopped before I painted the last letter. Soul Mastery became the name of my soul mission and I realised that Amenet Drago was the true name of my soul, although I sense that Drago is more a title than a name. They are now an intricate part of my identity.

Later, I asked my soul group, the collective from which my soul extends, to tell me about the relationship between my soul and Mastery the black dragon. They told me of a distant time on Earth when people and dragons walked together. A time we know as Lemuria. It was not like nowadays, humans were not restricted to the physical realms, they had a great many more abilities than are awake in humanity currently. A dragon and a person could create a partnership that was deep and abiding. They would achieve many marvellous things together and my soul was such, a Drago or dragon walker.

Eventually, as humanity faced a corruption of their energies, the dragons retreated to the inner planes, but the deep bonds remained. I believe there are many people alive today on Earth whose souls are calling in their beloved dragons again. The dragons are here in the energetic to be with our souls and help us fulfil our soul purpose. My dragon is working with my soul as we support souls who are transitioning through the process we call death.

On New Year’s Eve night as 2021 ended, I received guidance from my soul group explaining how Mastery and I are here to support the Truth Maker souls who are choosing to transition at this time from their Earthly existence to the inner planes. As they transition, they are creating powerful energies of truth which are grounded for humanity’s ascension. This work often takes place during my sleep and when I’m engaged to journey as a soul guide.

I humbly ask that I, as my personality, Ananda, will always be the conduit of love and peace that my soul, Amenet Drago, and my dragon, Mastery, require to fulfil their truth and purpose.

[Image: ‘Dragon Cloud’ – Photo of a storm cloud in the form of a black dragon over cacti, taken by Michael Shainblum, Tucson, Arizona]

Posted in death, love, Soul Mastery, transformation

Journey Beyond the Veil

Have you ever been present at the moment someone died?

In my experience, the energy often begins to change before the moment of the soul passing on. It begins from the moment the personality and soul align their acceptance of the transition.

In sudden death situations, everything may seem to be happening quite fast from the outside, but to the person dying, it all really does slow right down and every moment is experienced in full presence, so the moment that inevitability is grasped by the personality, they are aligned with the soul who already knew the event was about to happen, because the event couldn’t have happened without the soul calling it in.

It’s not one’s life that flashes across ones eyes at such a moment but a profound in-the-moment knowing of truth. A peace and stillness, even in the face of chaos and great trauma. The consciousness is already detached, even before the body can be declared dead.

By the bedside of a dying loved one, you can sense a profound change in the atmosphere of the room from the moment your loved one comes to a place of peace with their imminent passing. Some time before they finally take their last breath, loved ones in spirit and one or more angels may well be present in the room. Perhaps their soul family will be there, sometimes, even an archangel.

If you are still and allow your breathing to slow, you might sense these presences and if you do, it will feel so peaceful and loving in that room. For us, the trick is to let go of the fear of death and loss so we can be fully present with the consciousness and soul of the person who is transitioning.

And when that last breath is taken, the one who is passing will already be above you. They may be greeting a beloved who is waiting for them on the other side, already wrapped in their arms. They are experiencing the most incredible moment imaginable, a moment of transition and their attention is turned away from their earthly existence as they contemplate a new understanding, that they are a light being and they have come home to their truth.

Already, all their ills have left them, they are free from all health-related restrictions, free from pain, suffering and danger. They are embraced in love and peace. It’s such a powerful moment, like a nuclear bomb of love, peace and truth has just exploded in that place. If you are still and if you can atune to your inner peace, you will feel it.

When your loved one has breathed their last, they are, in that moment, grounding all that beautiful energy into the Earth for you and everyone else. Their love for you is magnified by the realisation of their transition, for they experience a huge surge of energy in that moment that elevates their entire being to a much higher vibration. Which means their wisdom, understanding, love and compassion is profoundly increased.

Don’t panic at such a time, don’t start over-thinking about what it all means, just be there with them. It’s such an honour and a privilege. Wouldn’t you want that, when your time comes? Someone to be with you who can calmly hold the space for you? Your love and presence is all it takes to support them on their journey beyond the veil.

[Image: ‘Together As The Light Expanded’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, death, The Truth of our Being, transformation

Seeing The Light: Death As Birth

Imagine you’re sent away from everyone you love and who love you, everyone who understands you. Imagine you go to a place where existence is difficult, not least because you have a bad case of amnesia and can’t remember who you are or where you’re from.

Perhaps, you don’t feel like you belong, as though somewhere, deep down, you know you’re not home. Despite this, it’s not all hard work, there’s a lot to learn here, you’re becoming more aware of your truth and enjoying the delights that life has to offer.

Then, one day, through a situation that makes you think it’s the end of the road, that your life is over, suddenly there’s a great light. Life has brought you your death because your soul called it. It’s time to go and Life has finished with being your teacher. You didn’t want to die but the light feels so peaceful, so calm and so full of love. You’ve never felt anything as wonderful as this before.

But wait, wasn’t this what home felt like? All of a sudden, you know that your true home and true soul family and everything you’ve always been missing is right there on the other side of the light.

You only wish to enter the light and go home, nothing has felt more blissful, more beautiful, more right, for as long as you remember. You know there are loved ones that you’ll be leaving behind, if you go, but you instinctively know it’s their home too and one day they’ll be with you again. And you know that, from where you’re going, you can visit them whenever you wish.

As you step forward to enter the light, you experience the greatest surge of the most profound bliss and love and peace. It cannot be understood except by being there. You are simply aware of your oneness with all, your love of all, your divine unity.

Your true form, as a being of light is revealed to you. For a moment, you sense yourself suspended, floating between the indescribable beauty of planet Earth and the divine light before you. In that moment, the surge of love and truth that opened you up and revealed your divinity, is grounded and anchored into the planet, like a shaft of lightning. Mother Earth is present and she gifts the energy of that moment to all the beings living on Earth. This is your gift to your loved ones on Earth, for in this moment, you love every being in equal measure. In the next instant, a connecting cord is untethered from Earth and you are free to gently drift into the light.

As you enter the light, familiar figures come forward with beaming faces to greet you with such heartfelt love. And you know, at last, you are home. It’s as though you have been reborn and you’ve finally woken up from a strange dream.

[Image: ‘Seeing The Light’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, nature, Shamanism

Hummingbird Shaman

This is a picture-led post and this stunning image caught my eye. It’s a hummingbird-shaped naturally occurring ice feature discovered in a Michigan yard, photographed by Tammy Shrive, via LOCAL 12 WKRC-TV.

Then, in the usual synchronicity that the universe provides, I caught a fascinating TV programme all about hummingbirds.

There was a time when, in my shamanic practice, I called the directions using the Four Winds system. In this South American system introduced to me by Alberto Villoldo, serpent is in the south, jaguar in the west, eagle or condor in the east and hummingbird in the north.

In shamanic terms, hummingbird is connected to our awakening, our vision and the epic journey of our soul. Hummingbird brings courage and resilience and is the symbol for those whose lives are specifically focused on the journey of their soul, and I count myself as one.

Hummingbirds are migratory, spending winter in the South American rainforest, the Sonoran desert and the Andes mountains and travelling as far as the Canadian border for summer. They travel up to 23 miles a day, their heart beating 1,260 times a minute and their wings beating 15 – 80 times a second.

Across the species, they range from 5.5cm up to 13cm in length, and that includes their long beak and tail.

Living on the edge, hummingbirds exist at the very precipice that is the energetic trade-off between how much nectar they need to fuel their flight and how much flight is required to find the food. They literally dance between death and life every day.

They live at high altitudes where oxygen is thin, reaching their limit at around 43,000 feet. To achieve this, hummingbirds maximise the oxygen molecules in their bodies, which makes them uniquely equipped to live in the mountains.

Because of this, hummingbirds don’t have enough energy to sleep, they have to go beyond sleep and enter a deeper state called torpor every night, which is dangerous, another way they dance with death. Torpor means their heart rate drops from 1000 beats per minute to 70. Their nearness to death and association with a deep state of consciousness could be seen to label them as ‘little shamans’.

Hummers can fly forwards, backwards and hover in place because their wings are different to all other birds. Instead of rotating from the shoulder joint, they have a short arm and rotate on the wrist joint, giving their wings a much greater range of movement.

Their long tongue-filled beaks are not only for probing flowers but for serious aerial warfare, in the battle for flower access. They are combatant, in competition for the best feeding grounds and frequently fight to the death to protect their favoured flowering plants.

All in all, hummingbirds are pretty incredible, their fortitude and beauty are the least of the tools, skills and abilities that these ‘little shamans’ embody.

Posted in artistic, darkness and light, healing, inner child, love, Poetry, shadow self, transformation

Searching for Love

Is there anybody searching for love they never had?

Searching, yet, on self-destruct cos things are getting bad.

Because it’s quite a journey, not feeling worth a damn

Makes who you are feel like nothing but a sham.

Were you told no-one could love you?

‘Cos that’s just not true.

Do you know how many there are

Out there feeling just like you?

The truth is, very few know of your pain.

And very many feel exactly the same

And neither do they let their pain show,

Years of denial, taking knocks, blow by blow.

Running away through using drugs or booze or sex.

Always moving on from ex to ex to ex.

Or maybe it’s shopping or maybe it’s food,

The campaign to self-destruct is gonna get you screwed.

But always, underneath are words like poison darts

The ones that made you build defensive ramparts.

Words hiding in the back of your thoughts

That prove you’re worth nothing,

An aberration of sorts.

Well, you’re not, you’re simply caught up in a snare,

Take it from one who’s already been there.

I’m thinking back to what or who might have saved me

During the years when I wasn’t free.

Someone who’d been there, now doing fine.

Someone who knew how to draw a line.

Each journey is lonely and yet we all share

The same kind of experience, the same wear and tear.

Don’t feel resentful for things that don’t matter.

Find out who you are, let the past shatter.

Find all the love you need in your heart

‘Cos that will give you a true restart.

And don’t ever let anyone talk to you

With poison dart words that aren’t even true.

The love that will save you is the love you find inside

Let that love enrich you, it cannot be denied.

You are truly worthy, in fact, you’ve always been,

They didn’t have it in them, your soul was never seen.

But don’t let that stop you from moving on now,

You are amazing, let that be your vow.

Posted in Ascension, death

Soul Purpose Revealed

I have wondered why my spiritual support team haven’t shared with me what is my soul purpose, what is my unique gift for myself, humanity and the Earth. How many of us are still wondering, “What am I here for? What’s my destiny, my purpose and direction?”

I asked myself those questions over several years.

When I felt into it, it wasn’t time to know. Maybe I wasn’t ready yet or it would get in the way of something that needs to happen first.

On new year’s eve night, I opened up my channel, invited communication and my soul group came through.

Unprompted, my soul purpose was explained, that many souls are choosing to transition from Earth to the spiritual realms on the other side.

And my soul has chosen to be here to support their transition. I was asked to step up and prioritise my role as an end of life soul guide.

I would never have imagined this was my soul purpose, had you asked me only a few years back. It was thanks to my soul integration in 2018 that I embodied all the skills and tools being held by my soul to enable me to do this work. Since then, I’ve been honing those skills and now I’m ready to fulfil my soul’s purpose.

The souls who are choosing to cross to the inner planes are not doing so consciously, it’s their soul, not personality or mind that’s bringing on the conditions that enable their death. These souls are Truth Makers and their transition is enabling an opening to truth for us all.

I honour every soul. I honour every death, for we often only see this profound transition from the limited perspective of loss and yet, it is so much more. It’s a birth as well. It’s returning to our natural state as an energy being. It’s returning home.

(Image: ‘Freefall’ art by Amenet Drago)