Posted in death, Personal Story, transformation

Life After Death – one

I know there is life after death. How? Well, for one, because that concept just feels so right that when I try it on, it fits like the most comfiest garment ever. Then, I have a huge catalogue of personal experiences that show me this is so. And I don’t question it anymore.

For me, death is no longer the polar opposite of life because life is a continuum that moves through and out the other end of the gateway we call death. And I suppose this view has a lot to do with being fully integrated with my soul. You see, once you are integrated with your soul, you are no longer looking at everything from the perspective of being only your current personality and body. I am Ananda who is the body and personality that my soul is expressing through, in this particular incarnation, but I am also so much more.

I am my soul and my soul is infinite and eternal. I believe that all souls were created at the same time and have incarnated many, many times, and not always on the Earth. Our souls are a projection of the divine source.

I am all of that. So far, I have regained part memory of a handful of other lifetimes, and it’s probably impossible to remember many more, it would be overwhelming and a distraction from being Ananda.

And I also sense that, as my soul, I have spent a great deal of time on the inner planes or spirit world, more so than living on Earth in a body. And I have a strong sense that I vastly prefer not being in a body, but existing in my light body in the non physical planes, so I’m really looking forward to getting back there again some day, and to do that, I need to die.

Actually, I spend a fair amount of time over there when I’m asleep, using my energy body, and maybe you do too.

If we didn’t forget about all that when we are born on Earth, we would spend the entire time yearning to get back home, because being in the light on the inner planes is our true home.

The moment we start to see ourselves beyond our limiting bodies and personalities, we change our relationship with death.

I met a person recently who told me she didn’t want to leave her current personality when she dies because that’s her identity. She is hoping to unite with a past love who already passed through the door of death and be together as the personalities she knows. Based on my understanding of the spirit world, we do remain in the same personality as a spirit, even after our soul has moved into another incarnation. Every being we ever existed as continues on in existence on the other side. Whether the consciousness that I am now remains within them, I don’t know. I do know that the same rules don’t apply on the other side.

On the other side, you can be in many places, interacting independently, at the same time. You can manifest the reality of your choosing instantly, limited only by your imagination. You can move freely and instantly to anywhere, just by intent. You exist as energy and are not subject to physical conditions.

And you return to your soul group, your family from where your soul belongs and the love and connection you experience there is simply beyond description.

When a person dies, their experience of the inner planes varies, depending upon how much they remember it and there’s often a period of reconnecting with that state. This need not be so for those that travel there often in their energy body, through sleep, meditation or shamanic or trance states, whilst they were alive, they arrive with everything up and running, so to speak.

When someone dies, it comforts me to know they are going home. They are moving into such freedom and peace and love and total healing. They are going to revisit their recent life and realise the truth of who they are in a truly beautiful and affirming manner. They are going to be so enraptured by the light, they would fight to stay there rather than return to Earth. And they will still see, hear and walk amongst all their loved ones left on Earth, if they choose.

Of course, left behind here, I will miss them and I will grieve their loss. But I always have a lot of compensation for that through all I know of their new conditions.

And I know how to reconnect with them in the energetic, even though it’s not the same as being in the physical together. We can still talk and I will feel them around me.

The soul finds it far easier to pass through the gateway of death than of birth. Being born on Earth is much harder than dying. And considering living here can be so difficult, so challenging, so painful in so many ways, despite providing the opportunities we require for growth, it sometimes amazes me that we want to stay here so much or that we fear death at all.

That said, I also remind myself of the incredible beauty and the rich gifts that are received in living as the well-loved and blessed children of Mother Earth, not to mention the tremendous growth and wisdom that comes from experiencing this earthly life. And there’s nowhere else quite like it in the universe of the Creator.

Posted in darkness and light, death, Online workshops

Death is Our Teacher

Death is a subject close to my heart.  Being a psychopomp, a fancy Greek word meaning one who guides souls, death is ever present as a part of my role.  A psychopomp travels energetically using shamanic skills to connect with those who are in the process of departing through the transition we call death.  I help people and animals to pass over and also guide souls who are stuck, such as we might call hauntings, supporting them to move towards the light, enabling them to cross into the realms of spirit. 

I have found that the role of the psychopomp is all about those who are left behind, those sitting on the sidelines whilst a loved one is going through the process we call death.  Many times, I am present to support them, to help them let go, to be reassured, to move through their grief. 

Everyone is touched by death, sooner or later, we all lose someone we love.  And it’s hard.  It’s even harder that we belong to a culture that is not comfortable talking about death.  We are all concerned, not only with the grief of loss, but our own ageing and eventual demise.  How do we understand it, how to we prepare for it?  How do we talk to our children about it?  The truth is, so many don’t really know how or what to say and there are such discrepancies about what happens next. 

Personally, I feel very sure about what happens next, having had a lot of evidence from a young age to support my understanding, but this is the kind of evidence that cannot easily be shared. 

Recently, I’ve been working on a project with my niece, Psychic Medium and Rune Witch, Chloe Elgar.  She is someone who is very much in touch with death and embraces it along with life.  We have been exploring some of the energies death brings us.  That inspired me to consider running an online workshop on the subject of death because I really see there’s a need for us all to explore this together.  But then I thought, who will come to that?  And I let the idea fall away.  Then, a conversation led me to reconsider.  I was talking to a mother who was watching her twelve year old son struggling with the idea of death, and just as this was unfolding for him, his beloved one year old cat was hit and killed by a car outside his house.  He was devastated.  He is really getting an initiation into death from the energies on his path, it seems.  As we talked, I realised we do need to have workshops on death.  We do need to know how to help children manage the emotions and the ideas it brings, and not just children, we are just as much in need as adults. 

And from there, my next online workshop project was born.  Expect a few posts on this subject as I plan and develop the content of this new and, I feel, vital energy workshop.  As always, I will be calling in light beings from the inner planes, channelling their wisdom and supporting a deep state of awareness for participants to receive deep transformation in the understanding and embracing of the wisdom death offers us.      

Posted in Energy healing, Inspiration

Breaking

There are times when we feel like we are breaking apart.

Our heart is breaking.

Let it break. Let it break.

Go somewhere quiet and dark.

Lie down and play soul music in the dark.

(Try ‘Dido’s Lament’ sung by Kirsten Flagstad or Lisa Gerrard singing ‘Sacrifice’)

Play a song that ignites the passion and sorrows deep inside you. 

That’s what music is made for, to ignite our emotions and passions.

Let the music flow through your being and your emotions with it.

Immerse yourself, don’t hold anything back.

Call your soul in, ask your soul to send its unwavering loving presence through your being. 

Ask your soul to download the highest vibration possible from the divine source into your being.

Let the tears flow.

Break, if you will.

Then, you can put yourself back together again.  Better than ever.  And you will.   

Breaking is something to be embraced as the alchemical formula for transformation and empowerment that it is. 

Posted in Personal Story

Seeing Things Differently: What Is Ascension?

One of the ways I may see things a bit differently is when it comes to belonging and family.  Being adopted puts a different spin on it and being adopted and a person who looks at life from a spiritual and energetic connection, it really changes things.  It means I don’t think of myself as a physical being first, I don’t get that flesh and blood reality as my first or most basic state of existence.  Since I see us all as beings of light, as being our soul and not our personality, I therefore consider my family to be where my soul originated, which is ultimately the divine source.  And since my soul extended from there through the filter of my soul group, then my soul family is my heritage.  It frees me up from nationality, genetics and blood bonds.  Sure, I think of my adoptive family as my family, but when people talk of sharing DNA, of ancestry, I don’t have that. My bonds are with those that I meet on the path with whom I resonate on a soul level first and then everybody else, we are all from the same source. 

I don’t know what came first, the lack of genetic identity making me look deeper or the natural spiritual truth-seeker that I feel has always been within me (inherited from an unknown blood relative?) who happens to be adopted. It doesn’t matter, we are all on our own journey, doing it our own way, and that’s exactly as it’s meant to be. I have ancestors, they are the ones I call in, my guides and ancestral lineage from past, present and future lives, ancestors who share the way of the healer and the storyteller like me. But really, when we connect with our soul we realise so much more of ourselves than the physical beings we seem, at first, to be.

We are consciousness accessing a body, we live in a world of time-space, a dimensional experience we are quite capable of moving beyond. We are already, and always have been, multi-dimensional beings. We get senses of these varied dimensions through dreams, especially the ones that feel like we really went somewhere and did something. Also through meditation and trance states, through moments of heightened knowing or deja vu. Simply by beginning to view ourselves, others and the world differently, we move deeper into those higher dimensions.

When we do, we feel more connected and less separated. We feel like we exist in the flow of the divine source, that we are an extension of the divine source. We perceive events from a place of observation instead of judgement. We see inter-connectedness in every moment. We are living our truth from the centre of our personal power. Our intuition is our guidance before thoughts and feelings.

We begin to awaken and shift perspectives, to connect within and access our power and intuition. When we do that, our inner power and intuition start to share with us what we are here to achieve on Earth. This is coming through us from our soul and the divine source and we are offered situations and opportunities that serve us. As we follow our intuition, we know this is our truth.

When we follow our inner power and intuition it inspires us and fills us with love and peace, courage and strength. And we begin to embody these things in our reality. As we do, judgements and perspectives drop away. This is liberation, harmony, balance and oneness. This is ascension.

A lot of people are talking about ascension now, this is it, we are doing it. It’s not about sprouting wings and ascending on a cloud to the heavens, it’s not about becoming translucent beings of light and spirit and moving into the spiritual realms, leaving the Earth and our loved ones who didn’t make it, it’s not about achieving a higher vibration and accessing a state of being, an event of biblical proportions that changes our physicality. We are all those things already, we are beings of light and spirit, we can already ascend to the spirit realms. We need go nowhere and we look just the same. Ascension is that we recognise that there is only the divine source and the divine source flows through us. We are this already, we are waking up to realisation, and this is ascension.   

  

Posted in Inspiration, Soul Integration, spiritual skills and techniques

Conversation with my Soul and Ego

Beloved Soul, please help our beloved Ego right now.
Our Ego is struggling with this situation and these conditions and needs to feel our love.
Our Ego needs to know that, together, we have got this.
Let us show our Ego that she is not alone.

Beloved Ego, please accept the help of our Soul.
Our Soul wishes to pour her divine loving presence over and through you.
She sees that you are struggling with troublesome thoughts and feelings right now.
She is ready to oversee the burden for you.

Be at peace, Ego, for we are a multi-faceted, integrated being.
We are one and you will never need to carry everything on your own again.

Posted in inner child, Personal Story, spiritual skills and techniques

The Cycle of Hurt – Healing – Hurt – Healing

Sometimes we are called to write our posts as messages to others, but they are really to ourselves, to properly hear ourselves, which can be a healing thing to do.  And this is a part of a stream, you could say a sequel, to one written by someone else about me.  I’m assuming they won’t read this, they have decided to let go and move on now, so this is for me to share with you, reader. I share this because I feel in my heart there are so many of us going through similar conditions and being called to inner child healing. 

I got in touch with someone very dear to me over New Year and wished to let them know they were in my heart and mind.  It was a sweet and yet sad but brief exchange for me.  A few weeks later and I found out, through a post, that my dear one was hurt by the contact, partly because of me, partly because it brought up old wounds that I triggered that were not about me.

I got back in touch with my dear one to mend the hurt and ensure that understanding was reached for us both.  I opened up my heart again and offered to reconnect.  This time, it was she who walked away and now I am the one who is managing my hurt through writing. My hurt also comes from a wound from the past, but also from the certain loss of one I love so dearly. 

You see, I had walked away from our relationship previously, in part because I could see that we were hurting each other without meaning to, triggering deep wounds from our childhoods.  I am a retired psychological therapist, a clinical manager, and this is my specialist subject. Even so, I refused to see it for a while, and when I did, denied it for a while longer, and then tried to fight it and eventually bargained with it until I had no other option but to face it. Once I faced it, I thought I had been led here to be the redeemer, that I was ideally placed to make a difference, but eventually realised I was not there for that. We were a gift to each other in the way we came together as two wounded humans to help each other heal as equals and release what was never our truth, but was instead the received wounds of a wounded other, given to us before the age of seven when our cognitive abilities were still developing.  My dear one is yet to uncover that her deepest wound, like mine, is the mother wound, pre-dating the traumatic event she is aware of. We really did come together to be a mirror for each other and I hope we both learned all we needed before this point of departure.

I, for my part, have been healing my inner child and when I asked my guides, they told me I had 44 inner child wounds.  I have been told the hardest wound to heal is the one we receive in the womb.  I was the unwanted pregnancy of a sixteen year old girl in 1960, the result of an unwise casual dalliance.  Her Victorian parents persecuted her relentlessly for her actions, accusing her of making them both ill and indeed, they did become ill.  When one died, she was blamed for their death.  Her parents had been mortified about what their neighbours and family would think of them.  My birth mother received an offer of marriage from her new boyfriend, not my father, and the chance to keep me as their child, but she refused.  She didn’t want me then and she didn’t want me when I tracked her down in my early forties.  I grew as a foetus in a stew of whatever difficult emotions she faced, I knew from my contact with her that the reason she didn’t want to know me was because of the trauma that I rekindled. 

I went to live with a new family where fear was my constant companion. Emotional neglect, psychological and sexual abuse created many traumas for me, but mostly it was the ever-present, not feeling loved and being criticised daily.  It wears away at you. 

I know I’m not alone and many of us are carrying childhood traumas and their wounds.  A way to heal them is scripted below.  We need to visit and heal each trauma, it requires several visits to our inner children, each one can be healed and placed tenderly in our heart.  When I was told I had 44 to heal, I had already done loads of inner child healing, so maybe I originally had a lot more.  Since then, I’m down to 39, although I also had a mass inner child healing event recently, so maybe I’m down to much less.  When I notice a trigger situation and it’s accompanying behaviour come up, I visit another inner child and heal her. 

When I walked away from my dear one I realised I couldn’t help her heal in person, the only way I could do so was by working in the energetic at a distance.  So, I walked away, to protect us both, despite the deep desire I carried to remain with her.  To do so hurt more than I can say.  Despite this, I always hoped that one day we would be able get together again, healed and whole, reconnecting with the most amazing and deep purity of beauty, joy and love we once had together, she brought me by far the most wonderful of any relationship I have ever known, hurt and pain aside, what a ride of highs and lows it was. Today, I face the knowledge we won’t be back together again, this time for good, we are both going to try and let go and find a life apart.  And my heart feels broken again, like I have lost a piece of my soul.  Time for another healing. 

Here is a script you can use for healing your inner children.  I’ve found this method can be used for other types of trauma healing, I’ve used it to heal a past life with my dear one where a trauma of separation was kindled between us and played out for me in this incarnation, and now is healed. It’s from an expert in the field, Jen Peters.  You can visit her website here Jen Peters – Returning you to your True Essence (jen-peters.com) where you will find a free video version of this healing:-

In meditation, bring to mind a moment when you felt lost, confused, maybe abandoned, rejected.

Notice whereabout in the body that you become emotionally triggered.

Focus on the most strong emotional charge, if more than one place.  That is where the trauma has been trapped.

How does it feel physically?

Go deeper, what feelings and emotions are sitting in that part of your body?

Are there any other emotions sitting in there, in deeper layers?

Go deeper, dive into those emotions and physical feelings and notice a younger part of you that is sitting in that part of your body.  Connect with them now.

If you don’t see or sense your inner child there, then allow your imagination to bring that vision forward for you.

Notice how is this inner child feeling?

Is there more?

Now go in to your inner child, perhaps pick them up, sit down with them, make eye contact and let them know you are here now, you see them and that they are safe.

Recall what you noticed they were feeling before and reflect that back to them and remind them that you are here now and will always be here to love them and keep them safe.

Now it’s time to give them a voice, say to them, “I know you’ve got some really important stuff you want to say, please feel free to share that with me now.”

With that information, mirror that back to them with the reassurances that they need, that they are loved, safe and you are with them now.

Explain in your own words to them that how they are feeling is not about them and is not their fault, that others have passed on their own wounds to them.

Ask them what beliefs have they formed in response to this trauma?

Depending on what they say, mirror that back to them whilst letting them know it’s not true and remind them that they are loved and safe now.

Ask them again if there are any other beliefs they might have.

Once again, play the beliefs back to them with the reassurance that those beliefs are not true and give them specific reassurance that they are more than enough and always have been.

Ask them what patterns of behaviour have they formed, that they play out as a response to this trauma?

Depending what that pattern is, play it back to them and let them know it’s time to let that pattern go.  Let them know that they don’t need to do that to keep themself safe because you are going to keep them safe now, whatever they do.

Ask are there any further patterns that they are playing out?

Once again, replay the patterns and that they don’t need to do them anymore, that you are always going to be there to love them and keep them safe.

You may have noticed a shift in how your little one is feeling now, they are probably more peaceful and maybe sleepy.

So now, look them in the face and tell them that you will always be present for them, to love them and protect them now.  To nurture and care for them and never ever abandon them and that you are really proud of the little girl/boy that they are.

Let us bring in healing energy for them and visualise violet light completely immersing them that will dissolve away their wound.

You are holding a quartz crystal now that has a rainbow of light coming from it and so place that crystal into your body in the place where you first noticed the trauma coalescing when you started. And also place a golden drop of divinity there to intensify the healing.  The rainbow quartz is filled with templates and codes, with geometry and activations that will be specific to you and your needs.

Notice the rainbows starting to radiate out and surround and immerse through your inner child’s little body and also the gold, all the way out to the energy field. 

Now we are going to bring in some unconditional love, so placing some soft pink right into the centre, radiating out with the rainbows and the gold, see it radiate out until your inner child is wrapped up inside a bubble of beautiful gold light, rainbows and softest pink unconditional love.

Notice that they are going to sleep now or are really relaxed.

Now shrink them down to the size of a tennis ball, inside the beautiful ball of light, all wrapped up.

If there is anything else you would like to say to them now, go ahead and do that, but include letting them know that you are now going to bring them home to you, where you will always love them, always nurture them and always care for them and just pop them into your heart, still wrapped up.

If there is anything else you would like to say, just say that to them now.

Beautiful, you’ve done an amazing job.

Now take a little peak at the original scenario that you started with and see how that feels now.

We can have numerous inner children, each one of them holds on to one theme of distortion with its patterns and beliefs.  You can do this exercise with each inner child that is holding a different theme or belief which is currently holding your adult life to hostage.

By doing this, you will be able to collect and dissolve each trauma or wound, which is really powerful and beautiful work because you are literally loving yourself back to wholeness.  You are becoming the source for what those wounded parts of you didn’t get as a child and are still reaching out to others for.  You are now becoming the source for that.