Posted in healing, Personal Story

The Last Post

A writer fabricates a narrative by linking events together. Every story is coloured and defined, a comedy or tragedy, depending on how the writer interprets events and the connections between them. Without this, there is no story, only a landscape of disparate words. A landscape that is broad, infinite and mysterious, just as our inner landscape is one of divine magic and mystery.

To accept that inner magical landscape, we must abandon the idea of making any sort of connection between one idea and another. We grasp nothing.

Opening ourselves up to the mystical landscape of our soul and its wordlessness, that is the greatest healing.

Words don’t go far enough. There’s magic in words, they are spells, hence ‘spelling’, but for deep healing we have to get beyond words and into the abstract. We need to bypass the intellect which gets caught up with words. What’s called for is a deeper, wordless knowing.

That’s the kind of healing journey I’ve been on, the kind that heals from within, the only holistic healing there is. The kind that teaches you that everything exists inside you, everything. And it’s no longer words, it’s knowing.

When you’re reborn through that kind of healing, you are born to yourself. You are your own mother and you are foetus and newborn babe all at the same time. You are all that you ever were, are now and will ever be. Nothing is the same from that moment on. And there’s really nothing left to say.

So it is, this is my last post. My blog is ending here and now, this website will soon be taken down. Those who need me will find me, the universe will take care of that.

One day, there may be a new website, but right now, nothing more needs to be spoken, nothing is waiting to be said. I have entered that inner, magical landscape and from here, I am learning to paint my truth without words.

Posted in Inspiration, Poetry

Faith

An everyday interaction takes place

Which, due to it’s coincidental timing and vague reflection of the circumstances,

Is interpreted as a sign of a higher power at work.

This leads to a more positive attitude,

A change in behaviour.

And life improves,

Coincidence or synchronicity?

It brings faith that something better is possible

You are the maker of your destiny

You create what you perceive as the best and worst moments.

You may not perceive this because we’re not usually conscious of it,

But we are learning to stay conscious.

Just know,

Everything is One

(- taken, adapted and inspired from ‘Humans’ by Sam Vincent & Jonathan Brackley)

Posted in Inspiration, love, Poetry

A Moment of Deep Love

That moment

A teenager tells her mother she’s pregnant

How will her mother respond?

There are many possibilities…

I watched.

The mother looked deeply into her daughters’ eyes

Enfolded her in a hug

Nothing was said for a long time as they held each other.

In that moment, I saw how possible it is

To be the kind of person that,

Even when one she loves

Invokes deep fear within her,

She doesn’t think first of her own fears, beliefs, expectations or conditions

But bypasses them to see what her loved one needs.

What a momentous moment.

Posted in darkness and light, Inspiration

The Gift

“Have you ever felt like you were lost?

That you didn’t know where you were going or where you came from?

Have you ever asked yourself, “Who am I?

What should I remember?

What is my deepest wish from the bottom of my heart?”

I know you must have a wish like that, because we all do.

I learned that we really have to believe in miracles.

All you have to do is take that leap.

If you stop resisting and surrender,

You’ll see that even the most painful thing in life is a gift.

Instead of thinking, “How can I get rid of this burden?”

Ask yourself, “In what way is this a gift?”

The steps you take to escape the pain can bring you to the edge.

And if you cross over that edge, you can never go back to sleep.”

⁃ taken from ‘The Gift’ by Jason George and Nuran Evren Sit

P.S. The picture today is a close up shot of a monkey puzzle tree’s bark. If you enlarge and zoom into the centre of the eye, you might be able to spot two tiny figures, a male and female greeting each other with arms raised. Or is that just my vivid imagination?

Posted in Inspiration, The Truth of our Being

The Great Heart Sutra [Buddhist mantra to remove all obstacles]

The bodhisatva of compassion

Was practicing deep meditation

When he saw that all desires are empty.

Transforming all suffering and distress,

Form is nothing other than emptiness,

Emptiness is nothing other than form.

Sensation, perception, mental response and consciousness are all emptiness.

All is essentially empty,

Not born, not destroyed,

Not stained, not pure,

Without loss, without gain.

In emptiness there is no form, sensation, perception, reaction or consciousness.

No eye, ear, nose, tongue, body or mind.

No sight, sound, smell, touch, taste, object or thought.

No ignorance and no ending of ignorance.

No suffering, no death,

And also no ending of them.

No pain, no cause for pain, no cease of pain.

No noble path that leads away from pain.

No wisdom and no attainment, since there is nothing to attain.

The bodhisatva lives by life-breath and heart-wisdom,

With no hindrance in the mind and therefore no fear.

For beyond delusive thinking,

Right here is nirvana.

All buddhas of past, present and future

Live by life-breath and heart-wisdom,

Attaining perfect vision.

Therefore, know that life-breath and heart-wisdom

Are the great mantra, the vivid mantra,

The unsurpassed and supreme mantra

Which completely removes suffering.

Therefore, embrace life-breath and heart-wisdom.

Embrace and proclaim:

“Gone.

Gone beyond.

Gone utterly beyond.

Awakened!

Exalt!”

“Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate Bodhi Svaha

Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate Bodhi Svaha

Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate Bodhi Svaha”

[gatay gatay para-gatay para-sam-gatay boh-dee sah-ha]

Posted in Ascension, Inspiration, Poetry

Pilgrimage

We are on a pilgrimage of faith and belief

We were once cynical and isolated

We saw no future for ourselves or Earth

And worse, we didn’t care enough to believe differently

So, we set out on this journey

Learning to trust each other

We climbed the mountain of doubt when destruction was almost certain

And yet, hope was growing inside

Now, we have power

Power to save humankind from itself

It’s good we know fear

It helps us choose to use power wisely

We have all hurt ourselves and others

We have loved and been loved

Have faith

We are humanity and we have each other.

(- adapted from ‘Humans’ by Sam Vincent & Jonathan Brackley)

Posted in Inspiration

If It’s Easy, It’s In The Flow

When it’s right, it’s easy.

When it’s not easy, something’s not right.

Now, don’t get me wrong, difficult has its place.

Hurt, pain and suffering have their place.

But when we’re trying to find our passion,

Our gifts, abilities and destiny,

When we’re trying to find our way forward,

Look out for where it’s easy.

Look for what’s in the flow.

That’s your clue that you’re in the right place,

Doing the best thing,

On the right tracks.

Posted in Energy healing, Personal Story

On The Golden Road

Today, I am coming forward with a huge amount of love and gratitude towards myself, towards all the little versions of me I ever was, what they went through and how amazing they are. This is for me being me and for my journey. 

I’ve been on a healing journey for most of my adult life and a couple of months ago, it got hugely real and very empowered when I invited a very special person into my life to help me. Now, me being me is a whole new ball game and I could never begin to describe to you the many ways this is so.

The changes are many, they are unfolding and profound. I’m moving away from a fierce need to exert my individuality as something important, a need that I know has made me appear arrogant or aggressive. I’ve done that throughout the years as part of my inner child’s fight against not feeling seen or valued.

But I’m now letting that go for humble because I no longer feel like I need to fight for myself. When I fought for myself, I was not in alignment, not coming from a place of authenticity, it was fear expressing itself. It was wound and trauma expressing itself and it never felt right. I just didn’t know how else to be.

To finally find the peace to be me is more than wonderful, it’s a gift, a divine gift that I can now fully embrace. It means I breathe out and feel myself sink into the peace of letting go of the fight.

I don’t have to prove myself, I don’t have to convince anyone of anything or fear what anybody might say or how they might judge who or what I am. That’s been my whole life, fear of judgement, of being criticised as a moment-to-moment experience. To feel that it’s not happening or not important anymore, or just not there anymore, is peace and freedom.

Peace and freedom to love myself and others, to love everybody. It’s okay and it’s safe now. It’s all possible. From this place, in letting go of that tiring fight, which felt like the fight to survive, in relaxing into acceptance, peace, love, gratitude and forgiveness, I am proud of myself and can truly say that I love myself, I love what I am, who I am, and in seeing my shadow self, the not so attractive qualities that we all have to some degree, I love them too. I love all of me.

This journey isn’t about the past anymore, it’s about where I am now and who I am now. Here I am, a sixty year old woman, making her healing journey the priority and the journey is really empowering me.

Where I am now feels like a turning point. I have a vision of a golden road that just goes straight out in front of me, clear of obstacles and with a beautiful golden glow about it. I see myself walking down that road hand in hand with my little three year old self and all my healed inner children are walking with us, there’s quite a crowd of us now.

We’re on that road together. We’re marching forward together, and boy, what a mighty force of love we are.

I’m actively embodying self love into every moment of my days, in the way that I live, that I go through a day, the way I make food and eat, that I choose activities and interact with others. Embracing every task, making acts of self love and self care the foundation of my wellbeing.

Every time I choose something that doesn’t fulfil my being, it’s an act of self destruction at some level or other. The influence of my energetic self on my health and wellbeing is undeniable. I am stepping up to appreciate the richness that’s in every moment.

What is home for me? What’s my soul here for? What does it look like? Is it who I am, what I’m doing, where I’m living? And what am I calling forward? How am I manifesting and creating in my existence, my being and life? Because it’s from there that I express my soul purpose.

It means not hiding anymore but expressing my truth through my clear and true voice. It means being connected with other human beings in an easy, natural, loving, supportive and sacred manner.

And all this I manifest. I manifest everything very specifically, clearly knowing that I’m creating home for this soul in this personality at this time, in this physical manifestation upon the Earth.

And then it came. First, I received clarity about my divine plan. Then, along with others, I received an update that aligned my being to a higher dimensional vibration. I realised that as we receive this shift, as many have and more will, it’s important we realise that we still need to step up for ourselves and remain true to our power every day. To stay empowered through our inner peace, love and truth. To trust ourselves, believe in ourselves and hold that conviction steady. It’s down to us to remain in the higher vibration in every moment. It’s a moment to moment choice, not a given. The shift comes when we are ready to step up to that level of clarity and mastery.

All this places me exactly where I’m meant to be in the flow. That’s where I am, in the right place in the flow. When it’s right, it’s easy, that’s what flow means.

So, when the journey’s still difficult, there are obstacles, problems or physical conditions present and I know what that’s like. That’s been my journey for years, especially during the last six years. It means that healing is calling for our attention.

Posted in Abundance and lack, Ascension, Inspiration, love, oneness

Showing Up To Love

Do you realise

If we are to attain oneness and unity

As a human race

Anytime soon,

We had better start opening the door of our hearts,

We had better start spreading the love,

Being that beacon of light.

We had better stop holding back,

Fearing rejection,

Being polite,

Protecting our feelings.

No holding back now,

Nothing but honest to goodness

Authentic expression

Of totally ‘out there’ feelings

That radiate

One hundred per cent

Unconditional

Non-judgemental

Beautiful

Powerful

Supreme

Love

[Image: ‘Flower-Seed Suspension’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in Ascension, Personal Story, transformation

Emergence Four – Awake!

Just look at my lady’s slipper orchid, two flowers in full bloom. It’s now May and yet, the first flower opened in December, around Christmas! Isn’t that remarkable? Every year previously they have flowered for three months, but this year they surpassed themselves.

There’s a real emergence going on for me right now too.

My journey has been feeling like a birth process that finally reached the last push. Years of difficult labour are past and the waters broke already so now I’m ready for what’s about to be born.

My life, particularly a childhood of trauma is being transmogrified into something beautiful and incredible, something made of the most potent rose pink love. And it’s who I am, not a woman called Ananda, but who I really am beyond names.

I woke up this morning and there it was. All the answers I’ve been waiting for over the years. Clear as crystal. There, in my head before I opened my eyes, my soul destiny.

I know what I’m waiting for. I know what to do and not do, who I am and who I’m not. I know my soul purpose and how to express it. And I can see why I wasn’t ready to know until I got to this point.

I did the healing and now it’s time to fulfil my soul purpose for the new Earth ascension.

Now it’s time to get busy, I’ve got things to do, places to go, people to see. I’m making things happen and know they’re just going to flow, as long as I stay on track, because the Universe wants this too.

Everything that was already there, tantalising me as half the story, it’s coming into full focus.  Everything is blossoming.  My soul baby has been born and now she’s going to grow.

I did the healing and now I’m ready, it’s time.

What’s emerging for you, right now?

How do you feel about it?

How is your understanding of self changing?

[Image: ‘Lady’s Slipper Orchid, two blooms flowering’ photograph by Amenet Drago]