Posted in Ascension, Personal Story, transformation

Emergence Four – Awake!

Just look at my lady’s slipper orchid, two flowers in full bloom. It’s now May and yet, the first flower opened in December, around Christmas! Isn’t that remarkable? Every year previously they have flowered for three months, but this year they surpassed themselves.

There’s a real emergence going on for me right now too.

My journey has been feeling like a birth process that finally reached the last push. Years of difficult labour are past and the waters broke already so now I’m ready for what’s about to be born.

My life, particularly a childhood of trauma is being transmogrified into something beautiful and incredible, something made of the most potent rose pink love. And it’s who I am, not a woman called Ananda, but who I really am beyond names.

I woke up this morning and there it was. All the answers I’ve been waiting for over the years. Clear as crystal. There, in my head before I opened my eyes, my soul destiny.

I know what I’m waiting for. I know what to do and not do, who I am and who I’m not. I know my soul purpose and how to express it. And I can see why I wasn’t ready to know until I got to this point.

I did the healing and now it’s time to fulfil my soul purpose for the new Earth ascension.

Now it’s time to get busy, I’ve got things to do, places to go, people to see. I’m making things happen and know they’re just going to flow, as long as I stay on track, because the Universe wants this too.

Everything that was already there, tantalising me as half the story, it’s coming into full focus.  Everything is blossoming.  My soul baby has been born and now she’s going to grow.

I did the healing and now I’m ready, it’s time.

What’s emerging for you, right now?

How do you feel about it?

How is your understanding of self changing?

[Image: ‘Lady’s Slipper Orchid, two blooms flowering’ photograph by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, healing, Inspiration

Making Pearls From Grit

“When you create yourself, at some point you’re going to have to either let that creation go and take a chance on being loved or hated for who you really are, or you’re going to have to kill who you really are and fall into your grave grasping onto a character that you never were.

What is the grit that the pearl is built around? The pearl is the personality that you build around yourself as a protection against the thought, “If they ever find out that I’m worthless, if they ever find out that I’m not enough, I’ll be destroyed.”

The avatar you create and the cadence you come up with that’s pleasing to people, it takes them away from their issues and makes you popular, and then at some point you have to peel it away. It’s not who you are.

This is what everybody goes through when they create themselves to be popular or successful. You act a certain way and say a certain thing and lie through your teeth at times, and you do whatever you need to do to look like a winner.

And then at some point in your life you have to say, “I don’t care what it looks like. I found the hole in the psyche and I’m going through and I’m going to face the abyss of not knowing whether that’s going to be okay with everybody or not.”

At some point, they’re going to try to drown you in the middle of that abyss. But no, be the other guy. You told us you were this guy, the character you built, but no one can live with that forever.

People sometimes exist so completely in their character, they maybe don’t know how to get out of it or how to take another road. So, they might take the ultimate road, where they actually have to leave the planet to get out.

All we really yearn for is our own absence. We yearn for what happens at death.

I don’t have to worry about that anymore. I truly feel like if you ask me where I live right now, where the real me is, I would say that there’s a quiet, gentle seat in the universe that seems to contain everything and that’s where I am.

I don’t want anything. I have no ambition. I don’t have to go anywhere. That’s fascinating to me now….. the disappearing.”

– words by Jim Carrey (from the film ‘Jim & Andy: The Great Beyond’)

[Image: ‘Pearl With A Shell Inside’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in Ascension, Energy healing

Singing Yourself Back Home

Although a certain amount of clarity can be perceived through the fog of life, there is always yet more awareness and understanding to come, when what was lost is found. What is lost is your truth, freedom and power, that which was stolen from you.

And now it is time to call those energies back. Keep calling the energies that belong to you home. Keep demanding that they are released by those who took them. It is time. It is time to call yourself home, to finally be complete and healed.

You have been waiting and this is now possible. When you have re-integrated all your missing energies that were lost and stolen, then, the full extent of your soul purpose will be seen, like a sun that emerges from behind a dark cloud.

And it will be magnificent. It will truly be blessed. You will herald it as a marvel. And there will be so much love and support available to you from every side. Then, you will become the fulfilment that is your soul’s destiny.

Right now, your greatest need is to sing yourself back home.

(Here is a LINK to a free resource from Jen Peters that guides you through calling your dissociated energy back home)

[Image: ‘Mother Wound (close up)’ painting by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, Inspiration

The Gifted

There are two sides to the same coin,

And just the same, we may have two sides

Because of the gift we bear.

When we have a gift,

We contend with what it costs to have that gift.

And it’s hard to say what that cost will be.

The gift could be anything, any talent, ability or skill,

And it often comes from darkness

For, it is our earliest adversities that give birth to our greatest gifts.

The cost of that gift is the darkness that comes with it.

And if the darkness eats us up,

If we’re holding anger within us because of adversities from the past,

Be aware of the anger you hold inside.

Anger is a potent spice,

A pinch wakes us up, too much dulls our senses.

Anger is our fighter self who keeps us moving forward

But also, it paralyses.

Our strength came from darkness,

Our hope is in darkness.

We are light and dark, we are all of it.

As long as we accept it as so,

We will not be consumed.

(Words inspired by ‘The Queen’s Gambit’)

[Image: ‘Sparks In The Dark’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in Andromedans, healing, inner child, love, Personal Story

The Time is Right for Healing

Last night, I had the most amazing experience.  It was my second session with Multidimensional Healer Jen Peters.

In the first session, we spent 2 hours healing and integrating my deeply wounded inner children that were holding the trauma of chronic loneliness.  It left me feeling incredibly sleepy over the coming week as I synthesised the healing and adjusted to the trauma being dissolved from my being. 

Last night, we went back to the beginning of my life and worked with myself as a 5 month old foetus in the womb.  There were such a lot of traumatic energies that I was picking up from my birth mother, who was still a child herself at the time.  My little being was swimming in a soup of her shame, anger and despair.

But then, I also picked up a positive energy in the periphery, something that was supporting my foetal self. I didn’t know what it was, it just presented as a soft blue light.

As Jen asked me questions, I just seemed to know the answers and together, we found out so much.  We realised that my little being in the womb was wise and insightful, she had a strong soul connection and knew that this was the life she was coming down for.  She knew already that she was heading for my adoptive mother, not my womb mother.  I discovered that my soul was able to leave and return to this little one at will, which enabled a break from the dense and dissonant energies.  I discovered what a shock it was for the little one, for she had come from a place where there was only love and suddenly found herself in this harsh reality in the womb.  She sensed no love at all here, she was starving for it.  Her mother wasn’t feeling love for herself or the baby growing inside her, only hate and trauma.

Jen sensed something I have felt and been told from the inner planes for some time, that my soul is here to learn everything about love, even through understanding the lack of it.  My soul has been on that journey for many lifetimes.

As we were working together, I suddenly perceived that there was a circle of light beings surrounding myself and my womb baby and they were beaming out love. And I knew without doubt, they were my soul group and they were Andromedans.

Jen asked if they were always my soul connection or if they were beings I had been learning with. They said they were the seed and origin of my soul, but there were beings from Venus and the name Hather came up, these also have a strong connection with my soul, especially during previous lives spent in Ancient Egypt, and they were supporting my soul. Jen knew of the Hathors having a strong link with the divine mother and divine feminine energy. This made sense if they are connected to Hathor and Isis, they hold the Goddess energies. It might explain why I have a strong affinity with the divine feminine energy in this life, often making it the focus of my paintings.

The light and strength that the Andromedans flooded out towards my foetal self has always been present in my life, they told me they have always been there, even at the times when I felt completely alone. They have been the foundation of my eventual empowerment. They wanted me to know they are always with me and the love they feel for me is beyond description. Every time they told me this, tears started falling and sobs followed as I felt into the knowing that I had always been loved, after all. And not a love with limitations, an expansive, total love that my human being self can hardly fathom.

My soul group told me that my healing journey is currently the most important thing in my life. It’s preparing me for my life purpose, but they wouldn’t reveal what that purpose is yet. Jen and I got glimpses, that I am integrating the energy of divine union, getting to the core of oneness with love. This is my healing and task, to experience divine union with myself first and then… who knows?

During the session, my soul group also gave me information for healing my migraine aura symptoms. They implied that the condition was, in part, the result of receiving vibrations and frequencies that were necessary for me to receive. But now, by using sound through voice accompanied with movements, I am able to shift the energy. The vocalisation is spontaneous and is to be allowed to express freely, the movement will free up energy around my sacral and root chakras if I focus on the hips. The movement will also create vortexes alongside the sound which will reprogramme my energy. It was made clear that I didn’t need to understand this intellectually, just allow it to happen. My soul group said that when I do this, they will be with me, surrounding and supporting me, holding me with their energy. This is now a daily practice.

My healing is the one thing in my life that I need to focus on right now. If I focus on this, then everything else will naturally come into alignment too. I am beyond delighted that I invited Jen to be my multidimensional soul guide and healer. I have been fairly capable at navigating through the inner planes and receiving guidance, but together, we are creating such a powerful connection and she is the validator and mentor I needed.

Posted in Energy healing, Inspiration

Surge

Have you ever noticed the surge? The surge is like a tidal wave. It’s a powerful and sudden swell of energy that pushes what needs to happen forward. It could be anything. It could be healing. It could be love. It could be creativity.

All of a sudden, the lull is over and you are really moving, gathering speed. 

Be prepared, be awake.  Your senses must be alert at all times, even when you are dallying with the mundane.  The surge can arrive at any moment and then you will riding on the crest of a wave. 

[Image: ‘Waiting for the wave, Llangrannog, Ceredigion, Wales’ photograph by Amenet Drago]

Posted in divine magic, Inspiration

Make Space For Divine Magic Every Day

Where does divine magic reside?

Everywhere, but especially

In the spaces in between.

Between our words, our actions, our thoughts.

Divine magic is connectedness.

When the mind isn’t deeply engaged in a task,

When its relaxed, free to meander nowhere in particular,

That’s when we become available,

When the non-ordinary realms can connect into our open and undirected energies,

That’s when the magic happens.

That’s how we channel.

When/where do you feel most connected to the inner planes?

Maybe when you’re lying in bed at night or first thing in the morning,

Maybe in nature, when you’re experiencing the expansive energies of the great outdoors.

Do you ever wonder, “How can I get in touch with my spiritual guides?” Or maybe you wish to know your soul family, or the angels, fairies, tree spirits or ascended masters? Perhaps you’d like to invite a dragon or unicorn guide into your life…

By cultivating space between our thoughts, we leave room for the invisible realms to connect and communicate with us.

Let’s make space for divine magic every day,

Let your mind be free to meander, daydream, ponder, zone out

Allow yourself to wander in and out of consciousness.

Let go

We need more spaces between our thoughts to let divine magic flow in.

[Image: ‘Divine Spark’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, Inspiration, Personal Story

When We Are Free

I’ve just been through another dark night of the soul.

I’ve been through them before, ones that lasted days, weeks, months, even years.

The intensity of my darkest night only lasted 24 hours but the ongoing situation is much longer.

My dark night was intense, powerful, transformational and illuminating.

As I reflect back, I notice how much stronger I’ve become and how quickly I turned it around.

I can see how necessary and useful it was.

It came about because of a situation that many go through.

We reach a certain age when our widowed, aged parent is no longer coping.

Somebody needs to step up.

Maybe we’re the only one who can or will do that.

We do our best to make sure our vulnerable parent is looked after, helped to find their best life, a life where they’re safe, loved, happy and able to live every day with the best quality of life available to them.

We explain all the options and make sure there are choices.

Maybe that parent cannot make the decisions we think are best for them.

Maybe they are choosing what is neither safe nor wise anymore.

Maybe it’s difficult because of dementia, mental health, or simply a stubborn disposition.

Maybe the parent has all those things going on.

Maybe there comes a time when we have to make tough decisions for them, just to keep them safe.

Maybe we place ourselves in the firing line to do it.

Maybe we’re the only one prepared to act according to their best interests and that makes us the villain, at least in the eyes of our parent.

Maybe we spent the last few decades knowing this time would eventually come and always wondered what it would be like, how we’d cope, how our parent would be.

If we’re unlucky, maybe our parent will turn against us.

We may falter. We may take it personally, who wouldn’t?

We may be criticised, blamed, accused, when all we’re trying to do is the best thing that can be done.

And perhaps our childhood selves will come to the fore because this is the parent our inner child remembers.

The one who criticised, blamed and didn’t know how to love us.

And if it happens like this, it’s not a bad thing.

If we go through this dark night, we face truth once more, seeing new light, allowing more feelings to be released.

We are cleansed further.

We are not the same as our childhood selves,

We have gathered many resources along the way.

We have learnt how to be our own parent.

This time, we are different.

We are not looking for anything from our parent now.

We are not needing anything now.

We find it inside.

We are free.

If we are by their side at all, let it not be because we have to be but because we choose to be.

Even when it’s the hardest thing to be there.

Even if we keep getting slapped in the face.

Even when they spit hateful words at us.

Or spread them about us behind our back.

Or when we see our parent is showering our sibling with loving words that we don’t receive, even though they make excuses and don’t show up for them.

We choose to forgive.

Forgive ourselves and forgive our parent.

Because we are free.

And they, bless their soul, are not.

[lmage: Owl heart reflection photograph by aol.co.uk]

Posted in Ascension

Moving On Up

Don’t be confused by the word ‘ascension’.

It means to move up. It refers to an increase in our vibration. We are already vibrating at a higher frequency and this is continuing.

Ascension is not necessarily about moving on from Earth by dying, sprouting wings or going somewhere else. There’s always an ongoing, natural process of ascension occurring and it’s quickening up these days, more so than has happened in a while.

It’s happening to all of us, all at different places on our journey, different rates of vibration, all moving up together, whether consciously or not. And not only us, Mother Earth is expanding, so are all the beings and living energies upon the Earth, even the elements like water, air and fire are moving to higher frequencies. Everything is transforming towards a new state on Earth where the physical reality still exists whilst a greater access to emotional, mental and spiritual energies are attained also.

It’s happening now and it never stops because there’s a constant expansion of energy throughout the universe and beyond. It’s not only the Earth, every planet, every being, even the ascended masters are ascending, really, it doesn’t stop, we are all moving closer to our truth, the divine source.

When you see the word ‘ascension’, it’s just referring to the way that life is constantly moving.

How far you expand will depend upon how much you open up to it, how much you embody the energies of unconditional love and peace that exist within you.

Let it flow.

[Image: ‘Moving Up’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, I AM Presence

Prayer To Call In The Entirety of Oneself

“I’m calling in the energies right now, to own myself, completely and utterly.

To own all that I am.

To call in all the disparate energies that are me that have scattered to the four winds

Hear me! I call you back! I address all those parts of me, all those energies that ever left me or were taken from me.

It is safe. It is safe to return to the source, to be whole, to be healed, to be one. I am ready to love you, I am ready to own you

I own my body

I honour my physicality and the ways my body speaks through sensations and pain

I own my feelings

I embrace my anger, sadness, fear, hurt, and allow them to express and unfold

I own my story

I accept the hand I’ve been dealt, that my soul is choosing, and the learning my wounds have brought

I own my wounds and trauma

I allow the depths, the cracks, the burdens that I bear to give me their gifts and teach me their wisdom

I own my thoughts and beliefs

I observe the meandering narratives and persistent absolutes and thank my ego for standing at the interface between myself and the world every day

I own my heart

I ask my heart to remain open and enable the flow of love, knowing that my soul is ever present at my heart’s centre, knowing that the more open my heart is, the more freely the divine flows through me and from me

I own my voice

I enable my words representing my truth and vision to be expressed with power and conviction. I am ready to be heard and will not shirk from speaking my truth

I own my intuition

I get out of the way of myself and let divine inspiration guide me

I own my authenticity

My authenticity is the truth of my being, it is my acceptance of self, it is the owning of my entire multi-dimensional, multi-faceted and integrated being

I own my power

I recognise my sovereignty and know that I am rooted into my divinity and that my foundation is love. I have been holding closed the floodgates of my power but now I unleash my power upon the universe

I own my darkness

I am ready to see and accept that there are no sins, only choices. Whether foul or fair, it is all me. It is all a part of the canvas upon which the divine plays and explores itself. There is no judgement from now on, no evil exists here, only darkness and light, and I embrace them both as I would my children

I am ready to fully step into myself, to never falter from being true to me

I release all the energy that I’m holding that isn’t mine. Begone, return to your maker, you are not for me.”

[Image: This is my one and only tattoo which I call Kali Na Gig, a version of the Crone Goddess bringing forth the energies of empowerment. Inked by Pixtattoo, Southampton, UK]