Posted in healing, Inspiration, love, The Truth of our Being

Spiritual Freedom

Over the years, I’ve been chasing freedom and didn’t even realise it until it found me.

It turned out, freedom was not what I expected it to be.  I expected freedom to be a ‘doing’ thing and it turned out to be a ‘being’ thing. 

Being true to myself, that’s freedom.  And that meant learning who I am and that nobody else’s opinion matters.  Freedom is what happens when bravery to live one’s truth becomes second nature and doesn’t require being brave anymore.

Freedom is trusting oneself, finding the self-worth and love you need inside yourself.  Freedom is stepping into your sovereignty and rocking your power. 

I didn’t go looking for it, I just kept following my in-built instinct towards fulfilment.  And that meant taking down my walls and opening my heart, whatever the risks.  I thought I was protecting myself from the outside world but what I found was, until I did that, I couldn’t learn to love myself.

Freedom meant making some big decisions to change and acting from a place of love whilst surfing on the crest of the universal energies that guided me towards a new me.

It’s supreme liberation and it’s so empowering and enriching.  Spiritual freedom is such a glorious superpower to have.

Posted in divine magic, Goddess, Inspiration, Poetry, sexual healing, sovereignty

The Sensual Sacredness of Sexual Presence

“The value of the personal relationship to all things is that it creates intimacy and intimacy creates understanding and understanding creates love.” – Anais Nin

Sexuality and sex are not the same.

Sexuality is a nuance. An energy. A power.

Sexuality is worn like a softly clinging gown.

It’s an attitude, but not one that’s contrived, not like flirting, nothing so obvious or intentional.

Sexuality cannot be switched on and off, it oozes in every movement, every moment.

It’s natural. A desire to sip from the cup of life.

A sensual embrace with touch, taste, scent, caress, kiss.

It’s an art that ignites in the furnace of passion.

And whether it’s passion for a lover or the salacious delight of eating a succulent fruit, the juices flow and sexuality wishes only to bite into life and tear it apart.

She who embodies sexuality knows she is Goddess.

She is a force, a fire.

She is in love with everything.

She is everything.

Posted in artistic, darkness and light, divine magic, Goddess, Inspiration, Mother Earth, Poetry, The Truth of our Being

“It’s Just That You’re Not That Feminine.”

I beg to differ.

I’m feminine like a thunderstorm.

Feminine like the glint of a falcon talon.

Feminine like an ancient redwood.

Feminine like the orange glow of a grizzly bear in the sunset.

Feminine like a wolf on the hunt.

Feminine like decaying bones.

Feminine like the eye of an old whale.

Feminine like a roaring river.

Feminine like a sheer cliff overlooking a forest.

Feminine like a wildfire.

Feminine like a desert wind.

Feminine like a battle cry.

And yes.

Within my stones and bark and fur and fierce slit irises… I am as soft and enveloping as any woman whose blood ever beat red.

This is the Sovereigness.

I am her.

We are her.

We are an age of woman who has come in, representing the medicine of the Wilds.

We are not built to actualize your sense of masculinity through your traditional idea of femininity.

We are built to bring in the voice of our Mother.

Which is why Earth herself screams in our veins.

So, if what you really mean is,

“Your femininity is overwhelming”,

Then I understand.

It is to me, too.

~ Adrianne Tamar Arachne

The Art & Illustration Of Adrianne Tamar Arachne http://www.adriannetamararachne.com

Posted in Personal Story, sovereignty

Oh Dear!

Oh dear, what a difference a day makes.  Monday, somewhat past the eleventh hour, my solicitor introduced a number of troubling issues about the house I am buying.  I’m in a chain of five houses and we are in the week we were all hoping to move, seeing the week drift past as my solicitor introduces these troubling issues.  One by one, they are removed as I pay attention and address them.  Leaving one.  Apparently, my house has a deed of covenant dating from when it was built with pages and pages of clauses, several of which the present owner has breached.  That’s not so much the problem anymore, there’s now indemnity insurance in place for that.  But his solicitor was supposed to get the local authority to draw up a new deed of covenant for the exchange of sale between us, and this hasn’t been done.  The consequences?  I currently have no idea, all I know is my solicitor sent me a report and it said, due to this, I am STRONGLY advised (her capitals) not to proceed until this is resolved.  This is one big unresolved problem to slap into my lap when my buyer is waiting to exchange contracts this week, a week later than planned. 

I’m feeling a bit mad.  I’m mad at the solicitors for doing nothing to chase this up or put something in place to sort it and for not bringing this to my attention sooner and for not taking my calls or talking to me, except by email.  And I’m even a little mad with my husband who spends every five minutes shouting, yes, shouting into my ear (with the same stressy anxiety I feel too) telling me what I need to do about it. But mostly I’m mad because I’m feeling out of my depth and don’t have enough information to understand the situation right now. (Feeling a little overwhelmed here.) Actually, I’m feeling powerless and under-supported, even undermined, fairly or unfairly. 

So, I wrote an email to my solicitor and told her if this thing isn’t resolved this week, I’m pulling out of the sale.  Then, I lay down on my bed and fell into a deep sleep and had the most crazy vivid dream about a huge snake that crawled up my body.  When I woke up, I realised that pulling out of the sale is a stupid thing to do.  I knew it was emotive, reactive and a bit petulant, even so, I did intend to stand by it.  Now, I realise the cost of doing so is ridiculously high for me to follow through.  I could say something real hardcore here, but instead, I say “Oh dear”.  

I say I have no choice, but of course, we do all have choices, even when we think we don’t.  I can decide that my line has been crossed, my boundaries have been disrespected and that is more important to me than the money and the inconvenience.  I can still walk away.  And I can still see myself doing that, it’s almost as if the house has been tainted by the behaviour of others for me now.  Babies and bathwater keep springing to mind.  But I am so past fed up of being treated like a door mat, and this is not just about this situation but about me and my life and who I am and about standing up for myself, because I’m worth it.  How are we ever going to claim our sovereignty if we don’t draw that line and stand up, set our boundaries and uphold them? 

Okay, another day, and what just happened? Was that ego muscling in on my soul’s territory? I think the signs are there; personalising, feeling hurt and getting defensive, yep. Check, check and check. This morning, being Wednesday and the next day, I’ve had a little chat with my ego and we have calmed down. Now, would you believe it, my solicitor is telling me there’s nothing to worry about, excuse me? What were the capital letters all about yesterday, when nothing has actually changed?! Deep breath, letting go, moving on and moving house again.

In the dream, I was afraid the snake was going to bite me and so I tried to attack it to get it off my back.  The snake was too big to fight, it was bigger than a boa, and that didn’t work.  So, I found my balls and put my fear away.  I decided to walk out into the garden and let nature draw the snake away, and it worked.  After the snake was free from me, it transformed into a large greyhound.  Not entirely sure how this relates, although I can see some parallels, I’m hoping the greyhound represents a speedy process to move house from here on in. If anybody has any thoughts about my dream, I would be delighted to hear.   

Posted in oneness, Soul Integration

Four Ways to Tell Your Soul From Your Ego

Ego and Personality are interconnected, the clue is in the word ‘personal’.  What is personal is ego, what is personal is of the personality. 

When we experience soul integration, we begin to embrace our soul as our sense of self instead of the ego/personality.  The more the integration evolves within us, the more our sense of self changes. 

What are the differences between being our personality/ego and being our soul?  Here are four ways to tell the difference:

  1. EGO comes from a sense of separateness.  As our personality/ego, we view ourselves as a separate entity within the world, we are therefore subject to the views of others and find it difficult to move into a state of sovereignty with ourselves.
    SOUL is never separate and always perceives self from a state of oneness with all.  Soul is beyond personality, soul constantly exists beyond space and time, soul is energy and therefore perceives itself as energy, the same energy that everything is made of.  Soul is never anything other than a pure expression of the divine source, therefore soul is always sovereign.  From the stance of being integrated with our soul, we are always in our sovereignty, always embodying supreme liberation and our personal power. 
  2. EGO personalises.  Our personality/ego takes things personally, something most of us do many times a day, in little ways or big ways.  Because of that sense of separation, ego perceives that the words and actions of others are personal, therefore, we are subject to taking offence.  When we personalise, we respond in one of two ways, either we put ourselves down or we big ourselves up.  Either way, we are covering for a low sense of self-worth.  Personalising is all about low self-worth.
    SOUL never personalises because of soul’s constant awareness that it is interconnected to all that is.  If a person says something cutting, whether intentional or not, soul observes but takes no offence.  What is there to be offended about?  Soul doesn’t have a self-worth problem, it simply isn’t relevant because soul is complete and fulfilled and is never seeking the acceptance or admiration of any other.  Soul’s self-belief is beyond question because soul is its own source of love, acceptance and approval.  Soul is sovereign in all areas.
     
  3. EGO experiences hurt feelings.  A sense of separateness and tendency to personalise leads to hurt feelings.  Ego/personality is wont to experience hurt feelings commonly due to identifying as a separate, vulnerable being.  Why would we be hurt if we didn’t believe what was being said?  Or fear there is some truth there?  Why would we value the opinion of someone who could hurt us?  Ego is not confident in its own self-worth.  Ego cares about what others think of us because we haven’t embraced our authentic self yet.     
    SOUL does not feel hurt in any situation because soul knows that nothing is personal, since nothing is separate.  Even in the face of the greatest offence, soul is unflappable and does not perceive an attack.  Soul is only ever authentic and therefore would never accept and believe the voice of another over and above their own inner true voice.  Soul only ever hears the inner true voice inside.  When we are soul, we are sovereign, we are true to ourselves without question.
  4. EGO defends itself.  Ego/personality spends most of its time trying to defend the persona.  Persona is the construct of self we create to protect ourselves, it is not our authentic self.  Ego believes this is necessary to protect us from harm and from realising all the traumas and wounds of the past that could hurt us if we accepted them.  Ego, therefore, does everything it can to deflect, deny, blame, avoid and otherwise defend.  Defence is all about lack of trust in ourselves, about coming from a place of separateness.  It’s all about caring more about what others think than owning our truth.   
    SOUL has nothing to defend.  Soul is only ever authentic at all times, soul is the self’s truth.  Soul just is.

When we undergo soul integration, we are inviting our soul into our body space to fulfil the role that our ego/personality is struggling to achieve.  Our soul is much better equipped for the job and brings so many rich gifts, skills and tools with it.  Our soul is all that we are and ever have been, throughout every incarnation.  As we integrate more and more with our soul, we lose those experiences that are coming from ego/personality and become a being that is living in the physical upon the Earth as a soul, a being of light and love who transcends the limitations of the ego and embodies the authentic truth of our being. 

The Soul Integration workshop is about to be launched here soon. This is energy work that goes deep and downloads all you need to embrace and embody your soul in every aspect of your life. You will claim the full spectrum of your soul, all the skills, talents and abilities that your soul holds for you. You will uncover your soul destiny and connect with your soul family. You are walking a pathway upon the Earth and it’s sometimes a struggle to move through that pathway. By connecting with your soul, you are empowered, all that you are is empowered, to manifest and exist fully, absolutely and completely upon the Earth. Time to be your best self.

        

Posted in mythology, Soul Integration, sovereignty, Storytelling

“I Am Sovereign”

“I am sovereign.” These are the words of one who is embracing the truth of their being and it is an empowering daily affirmation to repeat this short, powerful statement. To be sovereign is to be one who is the source of their own needs. This person can truly say “I unconditionally love myself” and feel no sense of guilt or selfishness, for they are aware that to do so is a huge part of what makes them healthy, healed and whole.

Sovereign is a word that has a great deal of power. It encapsulates our personal power, our liberation, self-worth, authenticity and our ability to see ourselves as divine expressions upon the Earth.

Sovereign means we answer to ourselves and nobody else. We need no permission from anybody for anything we feel, speak, do or are. No permission for the decisions we make, the creations and expressions we choose to bring forth. Nor do we need acceptance, approval or acknowledgment from anyone outside ourselves. We no longer seek to fix or heal the relationships with our parents when we didn’t get our needs met, we know that the only healing to be done is the wounds we carry within us. We are no longer trying to be responsible for anybody except ourselves.

Sovereign means we truly own ourselves, value ourselves, we own our inner power and have no fear to express it in every moment. We stand at our centre, speaking and acting from a state of centredness. To say “I am sovereign” is a powerful way to claim all of this and more.

Here’s a story about sovereignty, it was written down around 1388 by Geoffrey Chaucer, although it was probably already an old tale. It is from The Canterbury Tales.

The story is about a knight who raped one of Queen Guinevere’s maidens. The penalty is death but the queen decides to give the knight a year to find the answer to a question, if he tells her the correct answer within that time he will not die, otherwise, he’s toast. The question is “What do women want?”

This is a moral tale that’s all about the empowerment and sovereignty of women. The knight can only succeed if he learns a fundamental respect for women.

The knight sets off and everywhere he goes, he asks men and women the question. He gets a different answer from everyone but the knight doesn’t think any of the answers are the truth the queen is after.

It’s nearly the end of the year and the knight is returning to the castle to face his death. On his way, he sees a group of twenty-four maidens dancing and as he approaches they disappear, replaced by what the book calls “a lothly lady”, meaning she was old and very ugly upon the eye. She promises the knight she will tell him the answer if he agrees to give her what she asks of him.

At the castle, the knight tells the queen, as instructed by the lothly lady, that what women want is sovereignty. This is the correct answer and the queen spares the knight’s life. Then, the lothly lady tells the knight that what she wishes in return is to marry him. The knight is appalled at the prospect but has no option and they are married.

As they go to the marriage bed together, the knight is upset and reluctant. The old lady asks him if he would prefer an old and ugly wife who would be entirely faithful to him, or a young and beautiful wife who won’t be faithful. She tells him she will be whichever he chooses. The knight ponders this and says, “I will accept whatever you decide, my dear.” She declares that his wise answer has honoured her sovereignty, she therefore becomes a young, beautiful and faithful wife. He leans in to kiss her and as he does, he is looking at the most beautiful young woman he has ever seen. Lesson learned.

When we don’t learn our life lessons, sometimes, the lothly lady will come knocking on our door bringing us kick-ass challenges to face that turn our world upside down. Sometimes, it takes that for us to get it. She is the Goddess in her Crone aspect.

Posted in Inspiration, Personal Story, Soul Integration

What’s in a Name?

What’s in a name?

Do you like your name?

Does it resonate with you?

You probably didn’t choose it, but it’s the most personal thing about you.

Some of us get our names changed as we go through life; nicknames, adoption, marriage, but we rarely get a say in what we’re called.

Unless we decide to change our name.

Changing our name isn’t easy. Often, other people find it challenging to accept, family and friends may struggle to use our new name and may be judgemental about our changing it. When we are in our power, when we embody sovereignty, we no longer go to others for permission when it comes to our sense of self. I spent most of my life limiting myself because of the perceived judgments of others and yet, when it came to it, when I said, “This is me and this is my new name, please use it”, the response was so much more accepting than I expected. I had found the personal power, not only to claim my own name but to be respected for who I am.

If we change our name, we can end up with a name we actually like, that fits who we are, who we’ve become. A name whose energy resonates for us and as us. It surprises me that more people don’t do it, it’s a wonderful way to claim our power, our truth, ourselves. We can be creative, colourful, expressing our personality and values. We utilise our clothes, hair, car, home, so many elements of our life when identifying ourselves, surely our foremost personal identification is our name.

Early last year, I went from Amanda, a name I never felt was really mine, to Ananda. Amanda means ‘love’ and Ananda means ‘blissful love’, it felt like levelling up. I didn’t get to choose my new name, I received it from my teacher and guide, personally, I would have gone for something more exotic and less like my old name. I use a number of goddessy name options as avatars in various places online, I expect we all do something similar, Ananda was not amongst them nor a name that had occurred to me. To be honest, my new name sometimes causes confusion, people mis-hear or mis-read it and end up still calling me Amanda and I correct them.

I also removed my second name which was Jayne and pretty much redundant, adding a second first name, Amenet. I received this name during my soul initiation with the knowing that it’s the name of my soul. Over the past year, I have found myself identifying with the name Amenet more and more as I integrate with my soul.

Three days after I finished painting my shamanic drum, I received a new name through my channel. I had already painted this very name on the side of my drum without realising the significance. The new name was revealed as my complete soul name, Amenet Drago.

I’m not going to change my name legally again yet, but I know it’s coming. In the meantime, I will start using Amenet Drago as I set up my new service, so you will see my name change on this site when the time is right. This name is not of my choosing either but feels so deeply personal and empowering. When I say it as my name, I seem to momentarily sense the ancient expression of my soul. Words contain power and names even more so. I feel like I am finally becoming the truth of my being and my name is an outward expression of that truth.

Do you like your name? Do you identify with it? Have you changed your name? If you were to change your name, what would you choose? If you’re thinking about it, what’s stopping you?