Posted in darkness and light, Inspiration

The Gift

“Have you ever felt like you were lost?

That you didn’t know where you were going or where you came from?

Have you ever asked yourself, “Who am I?

What should I remember?

What is my deepest wish from the bottom of my heart?”

I know you must have a wish like that, because we all do.

I learned that we really have to believe in miracles.

All you have to do is take that leap.

If you stop resisting and surrender,

You’ll see that even the most painful thing in life is a gift.

Instead of thinking, “How can I get rid of this burden?”

Ask yourself, “In what way is this a gift?”

The steps you take to escape the pain can bring you to the edge.

And if you cross over that edge, you can never go back to sleep.”

⁃ taken from ‘The Gift’ by Jason George and Nuran Evren Sit

P.S. The picture today is a close up shot of a monkey puzzle tree’s bark. If you enlarge and zoom into the centre of the eye, you might be able to spot two tiny figures, a male and female greeting each other with arms raised. Or is that just my vivid imagination?

Posted in Inspiration, The Truth of our Being

The Great Heart Sutra [Buddhist mantra to remove all obstacles]

The bodhisatva of compassion

Was practicing deep meditation

When he saw that all desires are empty.

Transforming all suffering and distress,

Form is nothing other than emptiness,

Emptiness is nothing other than form.

Sensation, perception, mental response and consciousness are all emptiness.

All is essentially empty,

Not born, not destroyed,

Not stained, not pure,

Without loss, without gain.

In emptiness there is no form, sensation, perception, reaction or consciousness.

No eye, ear, nose, tongue, body or mind.

No sight, sound, smell, touch, taste, object or thought.

No ignorance and no ending of ignorance.

No suffering, no death,

And also no ending of them.

No pain, no cause for pain, no cease of pain.

No noble path that leads away from pain.

No wisdom and no attainment, since there is nothing to attain.

The bodhisatva lives by life-breath and heart-wisdom,

With no hindrance in the mind and therefore no fear.

For beyond delusive thinking,

Right here is nirvana.

All buddhas of past, present and future

Live by life-breath and heart-wisdom,

Attaining perfect vision.

Therefore, know that life-breath and heart-wisdom

Are the great mantra, the vivid mantra,

The unsurpassed and supreme mantra

Which completely removes suffering.

Therefore, embrace life-breath and heart-wisdom.

Embrace and proclaim:

“Gone.

Gone beyond.

Gone utterly beyond.

Awakened!

Exalt!”

“Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate Bodhi Svaha

Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate Bodhi Svaha

Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate Bodhi Svaha”

[gatay gatay para-gatay para-sam-gatay boh-dee sah-ha]

Posted in inner child

Loving Our Inner Children

Adults of any age, twenty, forty, even ninety, can act like children sometimes.

And I don’t mean in a fun and carefree way, I mean when we’re upset.

We go back to that childhood feeling of vulnerability when we had much less resources to call on in dealing with emotional upsets.

We act like children when one of our inner children is activated.

Maybe we’re petulant, maybe we don’t listen, we shout or scream, we get tongue-tied and can’t express ourselves. Maybe we lash out, blame others, cover up and say things we’re going to regret.

We’re far from our clear thinking adult self at those times and that’s because we’re feeling hurt and back in that feeling from our childhood.

We don’t have one inner child, we have one for each wound or trauma experienced.

Most of us will have many wounded inner children, each carrying a belief such as “I’m not worthy; I’m not lovable; people can’t be trusted.”

Every time something happens to trigger one of those beliefs, the little child who suffered the original wound and created that belief comes to the surface.

Then, when we’re hurt and emotional, it’s easy to find ourselves acting like a hurt child again at such a time.

And if someone in your life is acting that way from time to time, that’s probably why.

Give them a break and give yourself a break, we all do it, unless we heal those inner children and relieve them of the burdens they are desperately trying to address.

To heal, we go within, find our inner child.

Listen to our child, really hear our child.

Acknowledge, validate, love and embrace that child,

Then, we heal and integrate our inner child into our heart space, finally letting go of what was never our burden to carry. And that’s such a beautiful thing to do.

[Image: ‘Surma Tribe Mother With Baby’ photograph by Francisco Mendoza Ruiz courtesy of Fine Art America]

Posted in darkness and light, Inspiration

Imperfect Is The New Perfect

Get comfortable with what’s not perfect,

Allow what’s imperfect in your life, imperfect in you.

These are precious gifts.

They bring treasures as well as pain.

Pain and suffering are so valuable.

When you experience and allow pain

You create space for the joy you’ve been missing.

Your imperfect is beautiful,

Let imperfect be your perfect.

[Image: ‘The Green Goblin’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in healing, inner child

Möbius Loop

Have you ever wondered how it is that the person in the family that had the hardest time often ends up the most insightful, healed and spiritually aware?

It’s true for myself and several people I know, both in my wider family and outside of it, but not always so.

I think, in the end, it’s down to us. We are given adversities for a reason, they are teachers and they will fast-track us to greater fulfilment if we let them. Or maybe we’ll fall apart, or remain asleep.

I was meditating today, sending love and talking with my healed and integrated inner children.

I received understanding that I was sending loving energy to each child in the past.

Which means I was sending loving energy to myself as a child at all the most traumatic times.

I was even loving and supporting myself as a foetus in the womb, waiting to be born.

And myself as a sixty year old was present energetically at my own birth, waiting to hold my newborn self, greeting her and wrapping her up in unconditional love.

As an experience, that’s truly amazing, so precious and magical, and it’s thanks to Jen Peters’ masterful skills as a multidimensional healer and inner child guide that I get to experience it.

It’s no surprise, therefore, that I managed to survive as a child, even though I couldn’t see anybody there for me at the time.

I often felt alone and yet found resilience and strength inside, without which I don’t think I would have survived.

All the time, I was giving strength and love to my child selves from my future selves.

There’s no past, present and future, in reality, time is an illusion, it’s all happening at once.

Who you become in the future is who you always were.

Trust and believe in yourself, your best self is waiting for your invitation to step forward now.

You really are far more incredible than you might imagine.

[Image: ‘The Spark At The Heart Of Your Heart Is Timeless’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, Soul Mastery

Endurance

The challenges we face are where we find out who we are

The hardships we endure are when we grow the most

The difficulties we overcome are our testing grounds

The suffering we experience is when we are tempered

The darkness that consumes us leads towards the light

No matter how hard it is, our soul has called it

Our soul knows that this trial will heal us

Our soul is holding us, even if we can’t feel it

At the most burdensome of times, trust yourself, for you are your soul

There is always a reason and it will lead to your freedom.

[Image: ‘Freefall’ (detail) art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, Inspiration

The Gifted

There are two sides to the same coin,

And just the same, we may have two sides

Because of the gift we bear.

When we have a gift,

We contend with what it costs to have that gift.

And it’s hard to say what that cost will be.

The gift could be anything, any talent, ability or skill,

And it often comes from darkness

For, it is our earliest adversities that give birth to our greatest gifts.

The cost of that gift is the darkness that comes with it.

And if the darkness eats us up,

If we’re holding anger within us because of adversities from the past,

Be aware of the anger you hold inside.

Anger is a potent spice,

A pinch wakes us up, too much dulls our senses.

Anger is our fighter self who keeps us moving forward

But also, it paralyses.

Our strength came from darkness,

Our hope is in darkness.

We are light and dark, we are all of it.

As long as we accept it as so,

We will not be consumed.

(Words inspired by ‘The Queen’s Gambit’)

[Image: ‘Sparks In The Dark’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in healing, love, Personal Story

Acts Of Self Love

A few weeks ago, I started to consciously consider what was happening on a daily basis, in terms of loving and nurturing myself.

I was going through a difficult period, away from the peaceful solitude of my beloved sanctuary, my home, in an environment that was challenging every day, where making compromises was necessary in each moment.

A month long task of love and support for someone at the centre of my life was called for, someone whose own life seemed to be falling apart to them.

They were understandably scared and unable to appreciate the value of my presence or kindly intentions because of their health, anxiety and personality. Things were not running smoothly between us and we were both struggling.

I needed to look after myself as I looked after them but was too tired and too busy.

It took effort to structure some acts of self love instead of simply pouring myself into practical tasks for my charge. I made changes that slowed down my day and set me up for it much better. Initially, things changed.

It changed the atmosphere in the house and both our attitudes lightened. We began to be constructive, considering little ways to brighten the day and we related to each other with more harmony.

It didn’t last for more than a day or two because we were in such a difficult and challenging situation. The darkness still had plenty of gifts to bring and is still bringing them, but it brought a reprieve for a while, a refresh that could be repeated.

More importantly, it helped me remember something important, that when someone behaves badly towards us, there might very well be a scared and wounded child hiding inside that person, no matter how old they are.

Such circumstances are best met with gentleness and understanding, if possible, even when the natural impulse is to treat them as the enemy, which is reasonable when we’re under attack. I do know just how hard a thing that can be to do.

Especially when it’s a parent who was supposed to be the one to love us. Sometimes, that’s something that parents never learn how to do and it’s a big lesson for us to be the receiver of such a realisation.

When I look at myself now, I am proud of how I’ve navigated such a journey. I’m learning to be the bigger person.

When someone treats us poorly, we can always choose to be the bigger person by not answering their aggression with our own. And this is as true for nations as it is for personal relationships.

[Image: ‘Brilliance’ art by Amenet Drago]

Posted in Inspiration, love

What To Do When You’re Struggling (And Also When You’re Not)

An important thing you can do whenever you’re struggling is find at least three, preferably five, things to do that day which are loving, nurturing and caring towards yourself.

Be fierce when it comes to loving yourself and you might bypass a whole heap of suffering and self doubt.

The Divine Source is not floating above you but exists at the very heart of your being.

Therefore, love yourself intensely and give yourself immeasurable support, attention and affection.

[Image: ‘New Earth Ascension Blueprint’ (close up) painting by Amenet Drago]

Posted in darkness and light, Inspiration, Personal Story

When We Are Free

I’ve just been through another dark night of the soul.

I’ve been through them before, ones that lasted days, weeks, months, even years.

The intensity of my darkest night only lasted 24 hours but the ongoing situation is much longer.

My dark night was intense, powerful, transformational and illuminating.

As I reflect back, I notice how much stronger I’ve become and how quickly I turned it around.

I can see how necessary and useful it was.

It came about because of a situation that many go through.

We reach a certain age when our widowed, aged parent is no longer coping.

Somebody needs to step up.

Maybe we’re the only one who can or will do that.

We do our best to make sure our vulnerable parent is looked after, helped to find their best life, a life where they’re safe, loved, happy and able to live every day with the best quality of life available to them.

We explain all the options and make sure there are choices.

Maybe that parent cannot make the decisions we think are best for them.

Maybe they are choosing what is neither safe nor wise anymore.

Maybe it’s difficult because of dementia, mental health, or simply a stubborn disposition.

Maybe the parent has all those things going on.

Maybe there comes a time when we have to make tough decisions for them, just to keep them safe.

Maybe we place ourselves in the firing line to do it.

Maybe we’re the only one prepared to act according to their best interests and that makes us the villain, at least in the eyes of our parent.

Maybe we spent the last few decades knowing this time would eventually come and always wondered what it would be like, how we’d cope, how our parent would be.

If we’re unlucky, maybe our parent will turn against us.

We may falter. We may take it personally, who wouldn’t?

We may be criticised, blamed, accused, when all we’re trying to do is the best thing that can be done.

And perhaps our childhood selves will come to the fore because this is the parent our inner child remembers.

The one who criticised, blamed and didn’t know how to love us.

And if it happens like this, it’s not a bad thing.

If we go through this dark night, we face truth once more, seeing new light, allowing more feelings to be released.

We are cleansed further.

We are not the same as our childhood selves,

We have gathered many resources along the way.

We have learnt how to be our own parent.

This time, we are different.

We are not looking for anything from our parent now.

We are not needing anything now.

We find it inside.

We are free.

If we are by their side at all, let it not be because we have to be but because we choose to be.

Even when it’s the hardest thing to be there.

Even if we keep getting slapped in the face.

Even when they spit hateful words at us.

Or spread them about us behind our back.

Or when we see our parent is showering our sibling with loving words that we don’t receive, even though they make excuses and don’t show up for them.

We choose to forgive.

Forgive ourselves and forgive our parent.

Because we are free.

And they, bless their soul, are not.

[lmage: Owl heart reflection photograph by aol.co.uk]